Sometimes I wonder if I’m contagious,

if I reach out and touch you,

any one of you,

if you too would be plagued

to lie awake contemplating

the depths of feeling.

How do I know I love him the most

and if of the 3 I could save 1

it would be him?

Is it because my parents told me,

when he drove me crazy,

that he existed because of me,

“you wanted a little brother?”

I do remember 4 and 5 year old begging...

but if I can’t qualify why I love

him more than them,

how will I justify and know I love,

any one of you?

-srw